Shining like the light of the holy grail, far from anything monty python could conjure up, a solid gold rose could hide secrets of the same tier. Have you ever seen one? Doubtful. It sounds like something a stacked out rapper might dawn in their alcove entranceway to woo guests and show that yes, in fact, they do have excessive amounts of money. But this scenario resembles something like a wonky Beauty and The Beast, where the rose, rather than being kept in their mansions highest tower, is displayed to every damn person that walks in the door, consequently putting the owner on blast. Who's to say the rules wouldn't be different with a gold rose? Obviously the petals aren't going to fall off, and the rapper isn't going to transform back into a human, unless of course he's Lil Wayne, and he is in fact a "martian." So, what does this ornately enchanted item even do? My only conclusion would be that it's actually so shiny that when haters are exposed to it at the front door, it actually has some sort of massive blocking power, and turns them away before they even have a chance to enter.
DAY 188: Skirmish
Why start a skirmish? Is it because you're angry? Or maybe you just need to let off a little steam? There are quite a few reasons that people might want to square up and throw those hands like dreidles during hanukkah. For one, its easy to get frustrated with slow walkers. But in many instances those walkers should actually be using walkers, which just makes you a dick for thinking so aggressively. Another reason could lie in your body's inability to regulate temperature. You feel like someone only just getting acclimated to the excessive temperatures of hell and your body rejects itself, causing a hot head as well as a "hot head." Lots of things can piss you off out here in the jungle, but when that type of negativity comes along, no matter how prevalent, swat that shit out of the gym like a team of Zion's battling it out with the freshman squad.
DAY 187: Ice Colored Glass
Little known fact: Glass is an amorphous solid which means its in a state somewhere between a liquid and a solid. Have you ever looked at super old windows? Peep the lower reaches of the fragile barrier. You'll undoubtedly spot what looks like melted glass. It's not melted, though. Trust me. It's just the glass migrating down over painfully long periods of time. Like water on any smooth surface, it drips but never drops. I'm guessing the glass we have nowadays isn't prone to this phenomenon since we probably add a bunch of shit to it, but I hope it is because glass is kind of a crazy concept when you think about it.
DAY 186: Friendly Fire
I feel like every day is full of friendly fire. Not the "everyone around me is shooting in my direction," kind, but the "man, you're on fire!" kind of friendly fire. It's not aggressive or aggravated at all, just something like a flame is lit under me because the people around me are out here to succeed. Failure? Not an option. Let's get it done.
DAY 185: Singles
My wallet is always overflowing with singles and I couldn't tell you why. Its an interesting situation because they kind of just show up there unannounced. Am I mad at them for snuggling up between the leather of my walleto? Not in the slightest. I'd just love to have a sit down with them and discuss their lineage, and how they came to reside in my back pocket.
DAY 184: Hope
Hope is what you have to keep front of mind. It's a front lines sort of attitude. You can grind until you die, but when it comes down to it, hard work must be paired with circumstance and a little bit of luck. Make things happen, and you will flourish. This is more of a Motivation for myself than anything else. Put me in coach!!
DAY 183: Silver
Favorite silver things... GO! Air Max 97s, chains, rings, and other misc accessories, Macbook Pros, Surfers, spoons, linings, _______.
DAY 182: Dell
Remember when Dell computers were really common? C'mon, think waaaay back. Everyone and their momma had a Dell. Am I saying they were amazing computers? Absolutely not. But when they're affordable and reliable enough, middle America will eat that shit up like hot cinnamon rolls at a fat camp. I know, I know, that's insensitive. But, so was buying your family a fucking Dell. Yes, I had one, and I played many-a game on it, but would my middle school self have preferred a desktop that had a little more pizazz? Hell ya.
DAY 181: Gum
Problems are like gum. You chew on them and chew on them but they just don't seem to break down. Sometimes they're green, sometimes red, and sometimes white, but no matter their color, they often look inviting. They start out tasting a certain way, but as you chew the shit out of them, their flavor slowly dissipates. They become bland. With ever fleeting flavor comes the realization that this lowly piece of... whatever gum is made of, is just a vessel of deliverance. Deliverance of the fact that you've been chewing on a problem for too long, and rather than sticking it to the underside of a table to be forgotten about and/or scraped and disposed of by high schoolers in detention, you're still chewing. Next time you have a problem, stop chewing and stick it somewhere the world will forget about.
DAY 180: Slides
I just want to wear slides every day. I sit here at my desk reminiscing about the weekend, where all I did was slump around in slides. Yes, they may only be monetarily worth about $30, but in our hearts they're priceless. Can you put a number on breathable comfort? I think not.
DAY 179: Soft
If you don't sleep in on weekends, I deem you to be soft. As this is not the regular application of the word I am here to explain context. You are soft, because on weekends you are pressured to seize the day. You know, carpe diem and that nonsense. Well I implore you to resist those societal pressures, and grab your pillow by the case. Immerse yourself in those sheets, and keep up the sleep.
DAY 178: Crunchy
Why is it that texture is so important in determining if a dish is nom-nom or no fun? I couldn't tell ya, but some days I want crunch like you get from toast, and other I just want a freakin bao. Damnit, why cant I have a bao with a crunchy shell. Its like a cheesy gordita crunch from T-bell. MMMM, T-bell.
DAY 177: Fri
day's are terribly tiring.
DAY 176: Lightnin'
Fried Lightnin' to be specific. That's gotta be the most accurate descriptor for NYC's raging summer storms that present themselves with the immediacy of an ER waiting room packed full of starving ocelots. Sure, that might be an extremely weird comparison, but soupy-hot summer storms are an extremely weird phenomenon. Don't expect a west coast native to step outside and just accept steamy rain and stanky wet garbage at face value. There must be some kind of black magic behind this odd combination of separately-acceptable occurrences. Believe me, I know nature. I have the best nature. But, this shit shouldn't be accepted. I move that the city build a giant retractable dome over manhattan. Can you say "largest entertainment arena in the Continental United States?!" Sure you can, but now you just have to help me push the idea to the public. Maybe if I say it'll not only protect our heads from rain, but our hearts from hate, and our wallets from foreigners who will, despite American's constant complaining, work harder and put more money back into our economy than us privileged feelers of entitlement. Just so we're clear, this wasn't a rant, it was a discussion about possible city-based environmental solutions. Also, recycle!
DAY 175: Pearls and Water
Pearls seized from the salty blue depths. As fleeting liquid finds chaos in contact, treasure that lays in silence sees no light. A stagnant life feeds forth and creates beauty from granules of nothing.
DAY 174: A Genie
There are so many situations where dropping the sarcastic "If only" is necessary. "It's not like I know how to fix the cold brew tap," "Oh, if only!" "Hey do you know how to properly mix a salad?" "If only!" "I wonder if it would be easy to run a mile in 98% humidity" "If only!" "It's not like I'm solving world hunger." "If only!" If there was an "If only" genie, we would have a lot more interesting things in this world that we only speculate about now. ATLANTIS?! "If only!"
DAY 173: Beard
I had one once. It was nice. Warm, welcoming, clean. But now my face longs for companionship. It yearns for protection and calls out to that which simply aims to provide shelter. Keep yearning for love, face. You may soon find it.
DAY 172: Gold
I wish I had a large amount of gold. Like dwarf level gold. Like Smog took my shit and now I need to seize what's rightfully mine. Fuck you Smog, that shit took forever to acquire and you just up and swoop it? Smog is basically a metaphor for the metaphoric tax man. He's a greedy mother fucker. Let me pay my bills you filthy Gecko!
DAY 171: Health
Healthy just feels better. When you eat too much sugar, you feel like shit, its just a proven fact. It's crazy that processed sugar has a gnarlier effect than cocaine. We don't recognize the addictive properties, but after you've had a ton of sugar, you crave the shit out of it, but just attribute that to hunger. It's not that simple, trust me. Candy just makes you want more candy, but the problem is, I can't stop eating it....
DAY 170: Clones
Clones would be creepy, but visually they would be striking. Think about the crazy physical installations we could create with like 100 of the same person. Terrifyingly amazing.