DAY 176: Lightnin'

Fried Lightnin' to be specific. That's gotta be the most accurate descriptor for NYC's raging summer storms that present themselves with the immediacy of an ER waiting room packed full of starving ocelots. Sure, that might be an extremely weird comparison, but soupy-hot summer storms are an extremely weird phenomenon. Don't expect a west coast native to step outside and just accept steamy rain and stanky wet garbage at face value. There must be some kind of black magic behind this odd combination of separately-acceptable occurrences. Believe me, I know nature. I have the best nature. But, this shit shouldn't be accepted. I move that the city build a giant retractable dome over manhattan. Can you say "largest entertainment arena in the Continental United States?!" Sure you can, but now you just have to help me push the idea to the public. Maybe if I say it'll not only protect our heads from rain, but our hearts from hate, and our wallets from foreigners who will, despite American's constant complaining, work harder and put more money back into our economy than us privileged feelers of entitlement. Just so we're clear, this wasn't a rant, it was a discussion about possible city-based environmental solutions. Also, recycle!