Day 5: Major Dickason's Blend

Today all I can think about is coffee. The smell, the taste, the beauty. It's a bit of a love affair, but life is really only worth living if you find love, am I right?! Most days I wake up and stare directly into the full-bodied, ebony glow of a hot french press, and let the brew cascade into my douchey Yeti mug (which actually keeps shit hot for hours). Not to mention this indestructible wonder might be strong enough to keep a sleep-deprived bear far away from your morning pick-me-up. If you haven't noticed by now, Yeti paid me to write about them. Seriously, they sent me a whole boatload of boat shoes, a pair of pastel shorts, a hat that looks like it might help you captain a yacht, and a full cooler of fish. Thanks for all of the valuable items Yeti, I was hoping to venture into Fi-Di soon. I'm also speculating that they were actually trying to kill me, seeing as my fish allergy has become widely known but not often remembered. You sly geese, you. Oh well, at least your coffee mugs work.