DAY 10: Yes, Saturdays are for the boys... and burial services.

No one starts a story with, "as Jimmy arose Saturday morning the sun greeted him with its golden warmth, spreading rays across the 6 am sky." The reason for this, I could only assume, is that Jimmy, along with just about every self-respecting fella in their right mind rolls out of bed between the hours of 11am and 1pm. This is not because we're lazy, or hate the sun. It's because prolonging the inevitable hangover only works if you're still asleep. Sure, there's coffee but other than a dose of hard drugs, there isn't much that could make an early sun tolerable to a liquor stricken brain.